I know it’s Lent. I know this is a somber season in the liturgical year. But I also know that Jesus said, “When you fast do not look gloomy” (Mt. 6:1). So today’s reflection is dedicated to humor. When I give talks or retreats, I always say: Hang on to your sense of humor. It will get you through the tough times in life. It will also make the easy times more fun!
So here are some bits of humor. I want to thank Sr. Madeleine, OSB, from Alabama for many of these. She and I had a bet on the Alabama-Ohio St. football game a while back. The loser (that was Madeleine) had to send the winner (that was me! Go, Buckeyes!) all kinds of cartoons and jokes…I hope these bring a smile to your Lenten face!
Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
I would be unstoppable, if I could just get started.
The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some, like me, just don’t have any film.
You know you’re getting up in years when people call you at 9 pm and ask, “Did I wake you?”
Father to his first grade son: “What does your new teacher look like?” Son: “Just like my kindergarten teacher, only with a different head.”
As the little boy and his mother were riding down the escalator, the boy asked, “Mommy, what happens when the basement gets full of steps?”
First man: “How’s your wife?” Second man: “Compared to what?”
A cartoon showed a man dining at a fancy restaurant. Sitting across from him was a big stuffed teddy bear. Said the man to the waiter, “My last relationship was too complicated.”
Live so that you wouldn’t be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip. (Will Rogers)
My little son burst into the house and excitedly announced that he had won a prize in his first-grade class. After telling him how proud I was of him, I asked him what he had achieved. “I won,” he said, “for having the oldest mom in the whole class!”
I don’t panic when I get lost. I just change where I want to go. (Rita Rudner)
I’ve gotta be me. Everyone else was taken.
If it weren’t for electricity, we’d be watching TV by candlelight. (George Gobel)
Some people are born on third base and they go through life thinking they hit a triple. (Barry Switzer)
A very shy man fell in love with a young woman. He thought she felt the same way towards him, but he lacked the courage to ask her out. Finally, he decided he would mail her a love letter every day for a year and then he would ask her out. He followed this plan faithfully, and at year’s end he was courageous enough to call her—only to discover she had married the letter carrier!
Sign over the scale at the doctor’s office: Pretend it’s your IQ.
Sign in a farm-equipment dealer’s repair shop: “We do three types of jobs—Cheap, Quick, and Good. You can have any two. A good job quick— won’t be cheap. A good job cheap—won’t be quick. And a cheap job quick—won’t be good.”
A pastor had a kitten that climbed up a tree and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc., but the kitten wouldn’t come down. The tree wasn’t sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided to tie a rope to his car and tree and then pull it until the tree bent low enough that he could get the kitten. That’s what he did. But as he was pulling the tree down, the rope broke, the tree went “BOING!” and the kitten sailed through the air out of sight. The pastor felt terrible and walked the neighborhood asking people if they had seen the kitten. No one had. He prayed, “Lord, I commit that kitten to your keeping.”
A few days later he was in the grocery store and met a parishioner. She, who always said she hated cats, had cat food in her cart. “Why are you buying cat food?” he asked. She said a few days before her little girl was begging her to get a kitten. So the woman finally said, “Well, if God gives you a cat, I’ll let you keep it.” She told the pastor, “I watched my child go out into the backyard, get down on her knees, and ask God for a kitten. And you won’t believe this, Pastor, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her.”
Here’s a little song by the Okee Dokee Brothers, a duo from Minneapolis, MN who write bluegrass and children’s songs. This song is called “Out of Tune.” The video consists of clips that their fans sent in of children singing and dancing to their song. This song reminds me that life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful and fun! I think every time we laugh we experience that great truth.
Has your sense of humor been important in your life? Do you have any humor to share with us today?
PS: Last week WE reached a milestone with this blog. On Monday this blog had 1,166 hits! That’s the most hits this blog has ever had in a single day! I want to thank you for reading my blog and telling others about it. Now, I realize numbers aren’t everything. In fact, in scripture God seems to prefer the few and the least. And Jesus said feed my sheep–not count them! So I probably would write this blog even if only a handful of you read it…But still, thank you!
SALE! SALE! SALE! I hope I got your attention. I just saw that my publisher, Twenty Third Publications, is having a sale on three of my books: When the Rain Speaks, By the Way: 100 Reflections on the Spiritual Life, and In Steadfast Love. The original price is $12.95 or $14.95. Sale price is about $5!!! You can order by phone: (toll free) 877-944-5844. Or on-line: www.23rdpublications.com.