Today’s reflection is for anyone who needs a smile right now–or a little laugh. Here are some amusing items I’ve come across within the past few months. I, for one, believe that laughter is one of God’s greatest gifts to us. Laughter is not only good for our cardiovascular system, it is good for helping us sustain a positive attitude toward life–even when we may be swimming in negativity. And laughter has another important effect: it unites us with other people. As pianist and comedian Victor Borge said, “Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” I hope you will find something here to smile or laugh about!
“At the start of her kindergarten class, the teacher told her students, “We’ll be inside for recess today, because it was raining on my way to work.” One student raised his hand and asked, “Where do you work?”
Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they would be called baygulls!
A city in the state of Washington bought new snowplows and the locals were given the honor of naming the fleet. Three submissions were: Control + Salt + Delete… Scoop Dogg… Betty Whiteout.
Man #1: When I was young I dreamed that by the time I was 35 I’d have a stable full of horses, a big car, and a vacation home in Aspen.
Man #2: Have your dreams been fulfilled?
Man #1: Only one. I turned 35.
Isn’t it strange that “take out” can mean food… dating…. or murder?
My idea of a Super Bowl is a toilet that cleans itself.
Items from the real world:
Actual headlines: “Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge”… “Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim”… “Air Head Fired”…”Hospitals Are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors”… “Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charges.”
Quiz Show Host: In 1863, which American President gave the Gettysburg Address?
Contestant: I don’t know. I wasn’t born yet.
Defense Attorney: Did your investigation determine why the victim was there?
Officer: No.
Defense Attorney: Why didn’t you ask him?
Officer: He was dead.
TV newsreporter: Police are still looking for the suspect–a woman described as 35 feet tall.
What do you call having your grandmother on speed-dial? Instagram.
Said by a psychologist: We’re not addressing the elephant under the carpet.
Sign outside a church: BE GONE SATIN YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE
Two actual reviews of the Grand Canyon:
“No plants, no life. It’s like a picture of death.”
“It’s too big… Also my wife decided to divorce me while we were there.”
Have you ever thought or said these things?
“I do many things well… none of which generate income.”
“It’s finally the weekend, so I’ll either stay home and wish I’d gone out, or I’ll go out and wish I’d stayed home.”
“Pretending to be a functioning adult is exhausting.”
“I didn’t mean to push all your buttons. I was just looking for ‘mute.'”
“I hate it when I plan my day and no one follows it.”
“I wish I could drop my body off at the gym and pick it back up when it’s ready.” (I wish I could drop my teeth off at the dentist’s too!)
That reminds me of what Woody Allen said, “I’m not afraid of dying. I just don’t want to be there.”
“Sometimes I meet people and feel sorry for their dog.”
Which leads us to dogs and cats…
Fun dog T-shirts:
Life happens. Dogs help.
I left my dog to be here… this better be good.
Be kind. Do good. Pet dogs.
You can’t buy love, but you can rescue it.
Fun cat T-shirts:
Life is better with coffee, cats, and books.
That’s what I do. I pet cats. I read books. I know things.
Mug shot of a cat holding this sign:
Yes, I did it.
No, I’m not sorry.
Yes, I will do it again.
One cat won’t fix all your problems. But three might.
For reflection:
I’d be interested in knowing: did any of these put a smile on your face?
Do you have anything to add that might help the rest of us smile?
Our hope and our laughter are ultimately grounded in our belief that God is with us always–through all the ups and downs in life. Here’s a consoling song that reminds us of God’s continual presence. Written by Fr. Arnel Aquino, SJ, and performed by Fr. Silvino Borress, SJ, and friends, the song is called “I Am Ever With You.” May you hear God saying these words to you today…
I hope you’ll leave a comment below! I love hearing from you!
