If you’ve been a follower of this blog, you know I often stress the importance of hanging on to our sense of humor. So, as we face the beginning of a New Year, let’s take a break from all the heavy and serious things that may be weighing us down, and let’s laugh a little. Why is laughter so important? Because:
“Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” Victor Borge
“Laughter is the best medicine for stress–and it has no bad side effects.” Anonymous
“… humor is, in a certain sense, the measure of faith.” Pope Benedict XVI
With that in mind, let’s begin:
1) It’s all right to have a train of thought—as long as you have a terminal. Bowker
2) I earn a seven-figure salary. Unfortunately, there’s a decimal involved.
3) If you’re paying $3.00 for a bottle of Smartwater, it isn’t working.
4) I’m not in jail, not in a hospital, and not in a grave. I’d say I’m having a pretty good day.
5) Definitions: eternity: the last two minutes of a football game… hamlet: a small pig… acupuncture: a jab well done… coffee: a person on whom one coughs… acre: someone who is sore.
6) Young student to math teacher: “I can’t wear my new glasses in your class, because the doctor said they’re just for reading.”
7. After recess, a third grader complained to the teacher that another student had called him the E word. The teacher asked quietly, “What’s the E word?” The student replied, “Idiot.”
8. Before class began, the sixth grade teacher wrote this on the board: William Shakespeare 1564-1616. One student asked, “Is that Shakespeare’s real phone number?”
9. Proverb: “The person who catches a big fish does not go home through the alley.”
10. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
11. Only the mediocre are always at their best. Jean Giraudoux
12. Why is it that those who know the least, know it the loudest?
13. Lord, the day you made the skunk,
Did you act before you thunk? Y. Wright
14. When in doubt, mumble… When in trouble, delegate… When in charge, ponder…
15. The last place a person gets converted is in the pocketbook.
16. The priest began his homily with these words: “My job is to speak to you. As I see it, your job is to listen. If by chance you should finish your job before I do, please raise your hand.”
17. I can please only one person a day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow doesn’t look good either.
18. Bad spellers of the world, untie!
19. Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
20. Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple. Barry Switzer
21. Veni, vidi, visa. (I came, I saw, I shopped.)
22. I plan on living forever. So far, so good.
23. And finally, here’s an answer to the age old question: Does God laugh? Meister Eckhart wrote:
My Lord told me a joke.
And seeing him laugh has done
more for me than any scripture I will ever read.
I’ll conclude with a quote I copied (while a college student!) from the book Markings by Dag Hammarskjold, one of my all-time heroes. He was the Swedish-born Secretary General of the United Nations from 1953-1961. He died in a place crash in Rhodesia, now Zambia:
“A grace to pray for—that our self-interest, which is inescapable, shall never cripple our sense of humor, that fully conscious self-scrutiny which alone can save us.”
Did any of these tickle your funny bone?
Would you like to add something funny? If so, use the comment space below.
Wishing all of you a Blessed New Year!
As we face the beginning of a New Year, I thought it was appropriate to find a Christian song about hope. Here is Phil Wickham’s “Living Hope.” It reminds us that, for us Christians, our hope is a person: Jesus.
I invite you to submit a comment below!